*to the tune of van halen's runnin' with the devil* goin' through the motions

Just kidding, I'm putting all of my focus on this!

Mississippi St. +7.5  Weird stuff happens in the Egg Bowl! Also, when Old Mist and Mississippi St. play football.

Georgia Tech +13.5  "Clean, Old-Fashioned Hate" or whatever it is never sat right with me. I think it should be called "The Eternal Battle for Ol' Man McGillicutty's Wretched Soul."

Texas +2.5  Still not convinced Tammy is good.

Clemson +2.5  Clem must be very proud of his legions of large sons.

Louisville -3.5  Different story if this were at Kroger Field.

Oklahoma -10  LSU is cooked (and slathered in that delicious cajun cream sauce from Frenchie's).

Vanderbilt +2.5  I believe (that this will be televised).

Mizzou -2.5  If any team could play a game that ended up with a half-point margin it would be Arkansas.

Florida  This is a rivalry that should have a better name than whatever it has. 

Alabama -5.5  It's cruel that we have to wait until the last game to get this over with. It's also cruel that it's being played at all.

I'm thankful these awful people are leaving Auburn

Old Mist -7.5 @ Mississippi St.: weird line

Georgia @ Georgia Tech +13.5: hoping!!

TAMMY -2.5 @ Texas: tammy. Go back to the SWC you freaks

Clemson @ South Carolina -2.5: lol

Kentucky @ Louisville -3.5: Stoops got something for em? No!

LSU +10 @ Oklahoma: no idea. Oklahoma plays an ugly game, that's my logic. 

Vanderbilt @ Tennessee -2.5: I'm getting tired of Vanderbilt.

Mizzou -2.5 @ Arkansas: Hey get this out of my conference 

Florida St. @ Florida: lol

Alabama -5.5 @ Auburn: nope

Real Good Effort All Around

Really good. Thank you for a wonderful visit.

Always forgetting to put the records in here: 5-2 (63-40)

Never forgets anything: 4-3 (53-50)

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Old Mist -7.5 @ Mississippi St.

Georgia -13.5 @ Georgia Tech

TAMMY -2.5 @ Texas

Clemson @ South Carolina -2.5

Kentucky @ Louisville -3.5

LSU @ Oklahoma -10

Vanderbilt @ Tennessee -2.5

Mizzou -2.5 @ Arkansas

Florida St. @ Florida PICK EM (I saw Florida -1.5 on one app and FSU -1.5 on another app so I'm doing this.)

Alabama -5.5 @ Auburn

Week 13 equals We're Still in the Spooky Season

Simply delightful. 

Missouri +7.5 at Oklahoma: Got "13-16" written all over it.

Charlotte +44.5 at Georgia: who cares. hate this. 

Arkansas at Texas -9.5: sure???

Kentucky +9.5 at Vanderbilt: I thought Kentucky was going to be "fired at midseason" bad, but Stoops has, like the Counting Crows, been hanging around. 

Coastal Carolina +23.5 at South Carolina: Trap game?

Tennessee -4.5 at Florida: I don't think they will, but Tennessee losing to Florida again would be pretty funny.

Western Kentucky +23.5 at LSU: Gap trame?

week 13. truly, the season has flown by. they always do.

As my grandpappy always used to say: "You are going to screw this up."

Oklahoma -7.5

UNC-Charlotte +44.5

Texas -9.5

Vanderbilt -9.5

South Carolina -23.5

Florida +4.5

LSU -23.5

SoCon Saturday isn't quite what it used to be, but we've still got some stinkers

Your eventual winner: 5-2 (58-38)

Your certain loser: 4-3 (49-47)

Folks, Tha Captain is on a run the likes of which we may never see again.

=======================

Missouri at Oklahoma -7.5

Charlotte at Georgia -44.5

Arkansas at Texas -9.5

Kentucky at Vanderbilt -9.5

Coastal Carolina at South Carolina -23.5

Tennessee -4.5 at Florida

Western Kentucky at LSU -23.5

*Noticeably Agitated* Picks

South Carolina +19.5

Arkansas +5.5

Alabama -6

NMSU +39.5

Old Mist -14.5

Georgia -6

Mizzou -7

Thursday the Thirteenth: Still Spooky Season

South Carolina @ TAMMY -19.5: tammy

Arkansas +5.5 @ LSU: lol

Oklahoma +6 @ Alabama: This is the only game involving a "real" SEC team and one of the new additions that seems natural to me

New Mexico st +39.5 @ Tennessee: The proverbial whole lotta points 

Florida @ old mist -14.5: pine box

Texas +6 @ Georgia: Arch Time

Miss of sippy state @ mizzou -7: Committed to being disappointed by Missouri, because Missouri loves company. 

From my phone. No.

Now with 100% more RECORDS

SNAP Benefits: 3-2 (45-44)

CRAP Benefits: 2-3 (53-36)

--------------------------------------------

South Carolina @ TAMMY -19.5

Arkansas @ LSU -5.5

Oklahoma @ Alabama -6

New Mexico st @ Tennessee -39.5

Florida @ old mist -14.5

Texas @ Georgia -6

Miss of sippy state @ mizzou -7

Optimistic and Excited for the Rest of this Season!!

Oh ok.

Georgia -8.5

Mizzou +6.5

Auburn +6.5 Haha

Florida -3.5

Alabama -9.5

Already sending my regrets to this season

We are approaching not enough games for my comeback. 

Georgia -8.5 at Mississippi St.: No thanks

TAMU @ Missoura +6.5: Not interested

Auburn at Vanderbilt -6.5: Declined with appreciation

Florida -3.5 at Kentucky: I'd rather not

LSU at Alabama -9.5: Maybe another time

People are calling it the greatest week in football history

Silly for Dilly: 4-2 (51-33)

Twerkin' for Durkin: 3-3 (42-42)

:)    :)    :)    :)    :)    :)    :)    :)    :)    :)    :)    :)

Georgia -8.5 at Mississippi St.

TAMU -6.5 @ Missoura

Auburn at Vanderbilt -6.5

Florida -3.5 at Kentucky

LSU at Alabama -9.5

Normal Picks. Quotidian? I might go that far.

Screaming this at my computer. 

Texas -1.5

Florida +7.5

Arkansas -4.5

Old Mist -12.5

Auburn -10.5

Oklahoma +3.5

THE SCARIEST OF PICKS

Vanderbilt at Texas (-1.5): the death or serious illness of a loved one

Georgia (-7.5) vs. Florida: public speaking

Mississippi State (+4.5) at Arkansas: nuclear or biological warfare

South Carolina (+12.5) at Old Mist: rejection by someone important to you

Kentucky (+10.5) at Auburn: ghouls and goblins

Oklahoma at Tennessee (-3.5): heights

Week Ten Presented by the Spooky Season

Trick or treating with the kids: 5-2 (47-31)

Thinks he's seeing some cryptids: 4-3 (39-39)

____________________________

Vanderbilt at Texas (-1.5)

Georgia (-7.5) vs. Florida

Mississippi State at Arkansas (-4.5)

South Carolina at Old Mist (-12.5)

Kentucky at Auburn (-10.5)

Oklahoma at Tennessee (-3.5)

GET THEE TO A (week) NINERY

I was going to do these as Shakespeare plays, but after thinking about it for three seconds, no I'm not going to do that.

Old Mist +4.5 @ Oklahoma 

Auburn +1.5 @ Arkansas  haha could have been Hamlet (because of former Auburn quarterback Barrett Trotter (word for pig feet)).

Alabama -12.5 @ South Carolina

Mizzou @ Vanderbilt -2.5

Texas -6.5 @ Mississippi St.

TAMU @ LSU +2.5

Tennessee -9.5 @ Kentucky

I will not live in a pod. I will not eat the bugs. I will not miss the picks.

Old Mist +4.5 @ Oklahoma: Sooners are naturally Freemen on the Land

Auburn @ Arkansas -1.5: Auburn will lose this game.

Alabama -12.5 @ South Carolina: The red uniforms signify the red ink by which we renounce the bond that the United States Corporation has made through our birth certificates

Mizzou @ Vanderbilt -2.5: the gold fringe on the uniforms is because Admiralty Law is in effect

Texas @ Mississippi St. +6.5: if you sign your fishing license, you've signed over your rights

TAMU -2.5 @ LSU: my Moorish Nobility license plate is en route

Tennessee -9.5 @ Kentucky: the United States Postal Service is the real government

Week Nine, Feelin' Fine!

Pizza Man: 3-5 (35-36)

Sopping Wet Toilet Sandwich Boy: 4-4 (42-29)

_______________________________________________________________

Old Mist @ Oklahoma -4.5

Auburn @ Arkansas -1.5

Alabama -12.5 @ South Carolina

Mizzou @ Vanderbilt -2.5

Texas -6.5 @ Mississippi St.

TAMU -2.5 @ LSU

Tennessee -9.5 @ Kentucky

They Shut Down the Government so the Boys on Capitol Hill Could Watch Some SEC Football

Give the boys what they want!

LSU +2.5  

Oklahoma -5.5

Old Mist +7.5  

Arkansas +7.5

Florida -8.5

Texas -12.5

Alabama -9.5

Mizzou -1.5

SEC Picks as Cormac McCarthy novels

LSU (+2.5) at Vanderbilt: The Orchard Keeper - the first one, I probably won't remember what happened; it's not always clear why people did what they did; this one might be mostly about mental illness; set in Tennessee

Oklahoma (-5.5) at South Carolina: No Country for Old Men - a haunted man dreams of his father's generation, while terrible things happen around him

Old Mist (+7.5) at Georgia: Blood Meridian - includes the doings of an unspeakably evil character

TAMU (-7.5) at Arkansas: All the Pretty Horses - a beautiful and tragic story set in the Southwest; might just be the best one

Missississississippi State (+8.5) at Florida: Cities of the Plain - the depressing but inevitable conclusion of the story of characters we know

Texas (-12.5) at Kentucky: Child of God - too awful for me to watch

Tennessee (+9.5) at Alabama: The Road - somebody from Tennessee will die; the world might be ending

Missouri (-1.5) at Auburn: The Crossing - somehow the saddest; ends with people crying; despite the more grounded, human-scale nature of the misery, that very smallness--a lack of an overwhelming bleakness or extraordinary foe--makes it a worse thing to live through