Robert Byrd could play the fiddle

The world would be better if more politicians spent their time as mediocre bluegrass musicians as opposed to narcissistic sociopaths.

Changing rations to "bare bones."

The Oregon Trail twitter feed.

I can't tell you who to sock it to

Could you get any lamer

The new options for the Ole Miss mascot are an unsurprising mix of the silly and the predictable. Whatever they pick will probably be terrible.

If I were picking, they'd drop Rebels entirely. Instead, they'd be the Mississippi Rivers. A student dressed as a riverboat captain would be the sideline mascot. Every year before the Egg Bowl, the football team would catch an enormous catfish by hand and display it during the game in a big tank. If they won, they'd release the fish (who would be named Colonel Reb). If they lost, they feed it to a homeless shelter.

Saturday links

1. Highlights Magazine: The Evil Version

2. 50 States in a Week's Vacation

3. Tarrare "was a French showman and soldier, noted for his unusual eating habits. Able to eat vast amounts of meat, he was constantly hungry; his parents were unable to provide for him, and he was turned out of the family home as a teenager [...] After falling under suspicion of eating a toddler he was ejected from the hospital."

4. Bigfoot Encounters

crunch them numbers

50 games 107 goals 2.14 per game

lolz

Dear Prof Goeters Pat ,

In the course of a research at the Auburn University , I came across the dissertation:

‘ Torsionless Modules and Minimal Generating Sets for Ideals of Integral Domains ‘ written by your former student, BROWN WESLEY , in year 2006 .

As we would like to make the work available to a larger audience, I would be interested to get in touch with your former student to find out if he/she would like to submit the manuscript for review.

Therefore, I would be grateful if you would be so kind as to provide me with the email address or even simply forward this e-mail. Thank you.

Kind regards,
--
Kamini Gobin
Acquisition Editor

LAP Lambert Academic Publishing AG & Co. KG
Dudweiler Landstraße 99,
66123 Saarbrücken, Germany

Fon +49 681 3720-310
Fax +49 681 3720-3109

k.gobin@lappublishing.com / www.lappublishing.com

Handelsregister Amtsgericht Saarbrücken HRA 10752
Partner with unlimited liability

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Board of Directors: Dr. Wolfgang Müller (CEO), Christoph Schulligen and Esther von Krosigk
Supervisory Board: Prof. Dr. Johannes G. Bischoff (Chairman), RA Thomas Bischoff, RA André Gottschalk

Do you know what happens tonight?

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Two weird Simpsons comics links

1. Disturbing Simpsons

2. Don't Cry for Me, I'm Already Dead

I possess a sort of sociopathic narcissism that makes me think that I should be in charge of everyone

"My soul is terrifying"

The Chase for 2 goals per game

First 16 games: 25 goals (1.5625 per game)
Second 16 games: 42 goals (2.625 per game)
Total: 67 goals (2.09375 per game)

Told you it would open up. The seven that Portugal put past Evil Korea helped. For reference, the all-time list:

5.385 : Switzerland 1954
4.667 : France 1938
4.118 : Italy 1934
4.000 : Brazil 1950
3.889 : Uruguay 1930
3.600 : Sweden 1958
2.969 : Mexico 1970
2.808 : Spain 1982
2.781 : Chile 1962
2.781 : England 1966
2.712 : United States 1994
2.684 : Argentina 1978
2.672 : France 1998
2.553 : West Germany 1974
2.538 : Mexico 1986
2.516 : Korea/Japan 2002
2.297 : Germany 2006
2.212 : Italy 1990

Note that the top six were the first six world cups.

Edging Mike Leach and Tommy Tuberville in our hearts

Selections from the month of May from Jim Harbaugh's apparently real Twitter feed.

The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down Of the big lake they call Gitche Gumee The lake, it is said, never gives up her dead...

[...]

A lot of attention goes to our players on the field and in the classroom. But I am most proud of the moral character they display each day.

[...]

Congratulations to Newark (N.J.) Mayor @CoryBooker on his re-election! Proud Cardinal Football alum, Rhodes Scholar and world-changer.

My favorite 5 T.V. shows of all time: 1. The Rockford Files 2. "24" 3. The Twilight Zone (Rod Serling) 4. The Office 5. Curb Your Enthusiasm

Sept. 11 at UCLA - ESPN; Sept. 18 vs Wake Forest - ESPN2; Sept. 25 at Notre Dame - NBC; Oct. 2 at Oregon - ESPN; Oct. 9 vs USC - ABC.

Excited for the Cardinal program to have five straight games on national TV in our early 2010 season schedule. Unprecedented.

I am really looking forward to tonight's episode of 24. I am also contemplating changing my name to Jim HarBauer,

My bad

Manute Bol, who died this weekend, apparently originated the phrase "my bad."

Cruel people

"Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel."

Mark Twain, Damned Human Race

What did you do this week?

Just took care of business, that's all.

Friday Map Link

Where Americans Are Moving: click on one county to see all the movement between that county and other counties. Not as useful as it could be, but still fun.

Monopoly

The shortest possible game of monopoly

Stupid terrorists

But this view of the jihadist community is wildly off the mark. To be sure, some terrorists are steely and skilled—people like Mohamed Atta, the careful and well-trained head of the 9/11 hijackers. Their leaders and recruiters can be lethally subtle and manipulative, but the quiet truth is that many of the deluded foot soldiers are foolish and untrained, perhaps even untrainable. Acknowledging this fact could help us tailor our counterterrorism priorities—and publicizing it could help us erode the powerful images of strength and piety that terrorists rely on for recruiting and funding.

Nowhere is the gap between sinister stereotype and ridiculous reality more apparent than in Afghanistan, where it’s fair to say that the Taliban employ the world’s worst suicide bombers: one in two manages to kill only himself. And this success rate hasn’t improved at all in the five years they’ve been using suicide bombers, despite the experience of hundreds of attacks—or attempted attacks. In Afghanistan, as in many cultures, a manly embrace is a time-honored tradition for warriors before they go off to face death. Thus, many suicide bombers never even make it out of their training camp or safe house, as the pressure from these group hugs triggers the explosives in suicide vests. According to several sources at the United Nations, as many as six would-be suicide bombers died last July after one such embrace in Paktika.

The Case for Calling Them Nitwits

Relax the sphincter....

release the fixtures. A little reminder of how rare it is that a soccer fan has to go more than a couple of months without a competitive game to watch. Less than two months til the new premier league season. Also too, a harsh reminder of how short the college football season is. Cherish the special moments.

so far, so lame.

16 games played. 25 goals scored. It's early but no World Cup has ever averaged fewer than 2 goals per game. It should open up with the second dose of group games beginning this afternoon as many teams can no longer afford to play cagily for the draw.

Most impressive teams so far? Germany easily tops the list. South Korea was also solid. Can't be a coincidence that the crappiest of the bunch were Australia and Greece, the teams lucky enough to have witnessed the greatness of the Germans and Koreans. Argentina was probably better than the one goal they ended up scoring.

Upsets by Japan over Cameroon and Switzerland over Spain will reinforce the idea that the results of organized, defensive soccer can justify its mind-numbingness.