SO SPOOKY

Cold Mist -7 @ Arkauldron

Vampirebilt @ Auboorn -6

Horrorida +17 vs Gored-ya 

UMask @ Grislyssippi St. -18.5

VOODU -2.5 @ Scary Crowalina

Corpsetucky @ Terrorssee -16.5

spooky update: wearing a pinky ring!

SPOOKY

Arkansas +7  They're playing pigs, but Old Mist is looking for a 'goat... a scapegoat for why they have lost two games. Maybe they will "Blame" Kiffin.

Vanderbilt +6  Easy pick.

Georgia -17  Probably wrong. But possibly right. We'll know this time next week!

Mississippi St. -18.5  Now that they've been effectively eliminated from playoff contention, the pressure is off and the 'dogs can just cook.

TAMU -2.5  Texas A&M is good now. 

Tennessee -16.5  Kentucky lost to Auburn for Pete's sake.

somebody wake up the guy from green day, it's week ten

Green Day: 3-3 (43-34)

Third Day: 3-3 (34-43)

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Old Mist -7 @ Arkansas

Vanderbilt @ Auburn -6

Florida vs Georgia -17

UMass @ Mississippi St. -18.5

TAMU -2.5 @ South Carolina

Kentucky @ Tennessee -16.5

Iron Maiden voice: Six ... six picks ... the number of the beast

Oklahoma +20.5 @ Old Mist: a human number

Arkansas -7 @ Mississippi St.: Torches blazed and sacred chants were praised

Mizzou +13.5 @ Alabama: I feel drawn towards the chanting hordes 

Texas -18.5 @ Vanderbilt: Can I believe? That what I saw that night was real and not just fantasy?

LSU @ TAMU -2.5: Sacrifice is going on tonight

Auburn @ Kentucky -2.5: The evil face that twists my mind and brings me to despair

Welcome to Jurassic Picks

dinosaurs

Oklahoma +20.5

Mississippi St. +7

Alabama -13.5

Vanderbilt +18.5

LSU +2.5

Kentucky -2.5

No Idea What Week It Is! Ack!

30 Rock: 2-6 (40-30)

Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt: 4-4 (31-49)

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Oklahoma @ Old Mist -20.5

Arkansas -7 @ Mississippi St.

Mizzou @ Alabama -13.5

Texas -18.5 @ Vanderbilt

LSU @ TAMU -2.5

Auburn @ Kentucky -2.5

(swirling a snifter of brandy, considering the infinite possibilities of the human existence): I guess I'll make some picks

Auburn @ Mizzou -4.5: Officially done 

South Carolina @ Oklahoma -3: You can throw out the records when these two historic rivals meet on the gridiron. 

Alabama - 3 @ Tennessee: two teams with lots of talent but also Problems

TAMU @ Mississippi St. +15.5: I was picking too many favorites.

LSU -2.5 @ Arkansas: Friend, do not fool yourself into thinking Arkansas is even decent.

Ball St. @ Vanderbilt -26: if this was about me, it would be a Balding State

Georgia @ Texas -3.5: It would be cool if the SEC brought in Texas and Oklahoma exclusively for ad dollars, but then the sports media market collapsed and Texas won 8 of the next ten conference titles.

Kentucky -1 @ Florida: whatever

Idiot Alert!

Auburn +4.5

Oklahoma -3

Alabama -3

TAMU -15.5

Arkansas +2.5

Ball St. +26

Georgia +3.5

Florida +1

Oh that? That's nothing... just the largest lead in the history of the pick off.

Charlie Cruise Ship: 5-2 (38-24)

Captain Dingy: 3-4 (27-35)

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Auburn @ Mizzou -4.5

South Carolina @ Oklahoma -3

Alabama - 3 @ Tennessee

TAMU -15.5 @ Mississippi St.

LSU -2.5 @ Arkansas

Ball St. @ Vanderbilt -26

Georgia @ Texas -3.5

Kentucky -1 @ Florida

insert distasteful Hurricane Milton joke here

South Carolina +21 @ Alabama: I don't think them Cocks is gonna win, but Alabama might have some issues on defense [smash cut to Alabama's 51-3 victory]

Mizzou -27.5 @ (?) UMass: classic SEC match up

Texas -15 vs Oklahoma: [Collective Soul voice:] (that's where Red River goes)

Mississippi St. +34 @ Georgia: seems like a lot

Florida @ Tennessee -15.5: Leaning into the "bounce back game" narrative

Old Mist -3.5 @ LSU: seems that if LSU couldn't win last year with Video Game Numbers Jayden Daniels, they won't win now, right? 

Vanderbilt +14 @ Kentucky: My thinking: this will either be a close Kentucky win/Vanderbilt win or an even bigger blowout than two touchdowns--either what Vandy is doing works or it doesn't.

Toot toot (boat sound)! It's week seven picks!

Alabama -21

Mizzou -27.5

Oklahoma +15

Georgia -34

Tennessee -15.5

LSU +3.5

Vanderbilt +14

Week Seven (as in.. the seven seas!)

An Actual Captain of a Ship: 3-3 (33-22)

Tha Captain: 2-4 (24-31)

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These are the seven seas:

Gulf of Mexico - South Carolina @ Alabama -21

Boston Harbor - Mizzou -27.5 @ (?) UMass

Red Sea (that's where the Red River goes) - Texas -15 vs Oklahoma

Mobile Bay - Mississippi St. @ Georgia -34

Tampa Bay (RIP) - Florida @ Tennessee -15.5

The Bayou - Old Mist -3.5 @ LSU

Kroger Field - Vanderbilt @ Kentucky -14 (this feels disrespectful?)

Let's all meet at the Pink Pony Club to celebrate tonight's events

Congatulations to Vanderbilt, for beating Alabama for the first time since 1886, and to Auburn, to being a whore-hungry tire fire of a program.

Week Six wow season's really flying by huh

Mizzou @ TAMU -2: Let's see how stupid I am here. My initial impulse was, of course, Missouri is the better team. But when I looked at the schedules, I thought, well maybe not. Now I changed my pick. Am I moron? Time will tell.

Auburn +24 @ Georgia -24: Can't imagine how Auburn will conspire to lose this one in a fascinating and heartbreaking way. Wacky special teams and game delays are still in the mix, but a late-90s style beatdown from a superior East Division team is a good option too. 

Old Mist -9.5 @ South Carolina: no idea about either one of these teams

Alabama -23 @ Vanderbilt: nah

Tennessee -13.5 @ Arkansas: Pittman's last game??

UCF @ Florida +2.5: This is my "glad if I'm wrong" pick

oooh ah ah ah ah

Mizzou +2

Auburn +24

Old Mist -9.5

Alabama -23

Tennessee -13.5

Florida +2.5

what is the sound of one butt farting

it sounds like a fart, sis

Dr. Farts: 4-2 (30-19)

Mr. Farts: 5-1 (22-27)

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Mizzou @ TAMU -2

Auburn @ Georgia -24

Old Mist -9.5 @ South Carolina

Alabama -23 @ Vanderbilt It's cool that both Auburn and Alabama play their second biggest rivals this week.

Tennessee -13.5 @ Arkansas

UCF -2.5 lol @ Florida