well let's get to it

Coastal Carolina (+29.5) Hard to guess it. I have to imagine South Carolina is looking ahead, right? But Will Muschamp wants to look spread-y. Hard. This is a game where, writing it right now, I feel like I am going to go back and change it tomorrow. (update: I did)

Old Mist (+2.5) I think this line is pro-Texas Tech because people think TTU is close to Houston, when really it's literally thousands of miles away.

Auburn (-1.5) I'm a fool.

West Virginia (-10) NEERS

Central Michigan (+17) I guess?

Vanderbilt (-2.5) Just thinking about betting this game makes me feel like a degenerate gambler.

Louisville (+24.5) This will not be a pretty football game. 35-13, exactly not covering the spread.

Miami (-3.5) I am tired of neutral-site games. I guess this is closer to LSU, but I don't think LSU is that good. LSU has more talent but I think worse coaching, which makes this tough. I kind of worry Miami will win but not cover, some 26-24 nonsense.

---NEW THING---

All of my bets this season will be based on odds recorded on my TheScore app.

My bets: Louisville-Alabama will go under 62.5 points ($150)
Washington-Auburn will go under 48.5 points ($100)

Can you believe its 2018 and there are still only 2 people competing in this thing

Before reading these, imagine me doing the thing where LeBron throws chalk up in the air before a game but it mostly just gets in my face and I'm sneezing for half an hour. Also I have the body of a horse and the head of a lion.

south Carolina -29.5 south Carolina was my top performer last year so this year I'm going to keep "riding the cocks." Computer erase that. ah, crap

old mist +2.5 the rebs will want to go a good job for their fans

Kentucky -17  Kentucky's stadium is called Kroger field.

Washington +1.5 I am so confident that I intentionally used the 1.5 point line instead of the more common 2.5. "We don't need any stinking points" - Washington

Tennessee +10 why is it in charlotte

Vanderbilt -2.5 Remember when Vanderbilt played Alabama last year and gameday was maybe there and then Alabama won like 40-0

BAM -24.5  Alabama has been a 12 and a 7 point favorite and covered the last two years against ultimately disappointing USC and Flo-Rida State teams. What does that tell me about this large point spread? Nothing; I refuse to learn anything new.

LSU +3.5 yo yo yo yo yooo yo yoooo yo brent Schaefer



ok here are my wagers.

$100 on Tennessee to win straight up (+300, I stand to win $300)
$100 on Washington to win straight up (+110, I stand to win $110)
$110 on under 48.5 points in Auburn/Washington (-110, I stand to win $100)
And last but not least, I wager my final $690 on Alabama to win straight up (-2000, I stand to win $34.50)

Wow. You can really tell I didn't feel like posting that last night.

But I wanted it out there. I wanted you to have plenty of time to plan.

Stuff I should have put in the post last night:

History:

2016:
Chard: 50-45-2, 51.55%
Tha Cab: 44-51-2, 45.36%

20-21-1 on agreed results.
30-24-1 to you on polite disagreements.

2017:
Chuckamauga: 49-46-3, 50%
Capybara: 45-50-3, 45.92%

28-29-1 when our minds were in sync.
21-17-2 in your favor when our friendship was on the brink.



I guess usually the picks should be in on Thursday afternoons at 5.

Wow, time for football and picks

These... are football games.


Coastal Carolina @ South Carolina (-29.5)

Old Mist vs Texas Tech (-2.5) @ Houston, TX

Washington vs Auburn (-1.5) @ Atlanta, GA

Tennessee vs West Virginia (-10) @ Charlotte, NC

Central Michigan @ Kentucky (-17)

Middle Tennessee @ Vanderbilt (-2.5)

Louisville vs Alabama (-24.5) @ Orlando, FL

Miami (-3.5) vs LSU @ Arlington, TX


You pick all those games ATS. Also, you have $1000. You have to wager at least 25% or $250. You can bet it however you want. I don't care. My dogs don't care. As long as it's a real bet you can place at a real sportsbook or casino or whatever. I don't know how bets work so this will be a disaster.

Glen Campbell & Carl Jackson DUELING BANJOS 1973

my threads are fresh and I'm lookin def

You was in the gymnasium while I was putting chainsaws to craniums