Thursday, August 29, 2019

A Captain Makes Some Picks: Week One

Just like breakfast is the most important of the thirteen meals I eat every day, Week One is absolutely vital. The person leading after Week One has never lost in the grand and storied history of this great competish. So lets get at it, eh.

Hey, does anybody need to raise or lower boats, ships, or other watercraft between stretches of water at different levels on rivers or canals because here are some LOCKS:

Texas St. +33.5  Do you believe in miracles?

Kentucky -11.5  Kroger Field. It's called Kroger Field.

Old Mist +5.5  Old Mist was 2-9 ATS last season. I can feel my brain smoothening.

Mississippi St. -21  Not liking this anymore.

Duke +34.5  I'm sorry it's just so many points.

North Carolina +7.5  Almost made a bet on UNC to win. But I'm too scared!

Tennessee -26   The only "Ten I See" is the number of points by which Tennessee will actually win, damning me to the depths of despair.

Georgia -20.5  I actually think Georgia will win by exactly 20.5 points.

Georgia Southern +28  LSU always has a screw around game where they practice being useless. This assures that when they play Alabama, they will have perfected it.

Oregon +3.5  Duh.

Wyoming +17.5  In my warped perception of football reality, Missouri always starts the season slowly then gets going later. Is this true? I don't know. I don't know if such a statement can be true. What is truth? What are birds?



A humble wager: $1,000.31 on Georgia straight up at -1375. I stand to win $72.75. I hope I lose and I'm just playing with cents for the rest of the season.

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